SOME LYRICS OF THE LATE SIXTIES

The Day Begins

(Redwave, Knight)

Cold hearted orb that rules the night

Removes the colours from our sight

Red is gray and yellow, white

But we decide which is right

And which is an illusion

Pinprick holes in a colourless sky

Let insipid figures of light pass by

The mighty light of ten thousand suns

Challenges infinity and is soon gone

Night time, to some a brief interlude

To others the fear of solitude

Brave Helios, wake up your steeds

Bring the warmth the countryside needs

From Days of Future Passed Album by

The Moody Blues

A CITY OF DUST

Every time I pass by the cement factory of Benghazi, I remember my good doctor that taught me in the last semesters of college .He was an old doctor taught me a course

of animal behavior , and I remember him saying that when we will graduate , every thing we learned in our years of study will not be useful for us as the animal behavior course , he said “you will go out and go and work some day and have to deal with the real life , and nothing will be helpful to you as the knowing of the animal behavior ,you will meet the lion , the snake , the fox and the spider (he meant people of course) , and if you know how they will behave , you will know how to behave back to them !!”

Any way, that’ not my story!!!

Every Windy morning, my doctor came to us with red eyes and hard sneezing and coughing, he had a dust allergy.

He was always telling us that it’s a crime to build a cement factory inside the city, he told us that in other countries the cement factory is always placed outside the city and very far from it.

That day I went to see the cement factory area in a real Windy day before the rain has started , and I was shocked : all the area in front the cement factory was white , the trees where white , the ground was white , every thing !!!!

It is a sad thing to see, not talking about the effects of the pollution too!!!!

I think the sad thing is that the cement factory will always stays in its place in Benghazi, but my old doctor will die some day!!!

Lovely Benghazi

Note : all these pictures are taken from the car !!!

Wild swans
Three daughters of China

by
Jung Chang

yesterday , I have just finished reading the great story that I was reading , I recommend this book to read to any one who loves to read long stories, it’s a long book actually , a 496 pages , but it is not boring at all , and especially for the Libyan people , it should be so interesting for them …
just read the story , and tell me …….. where does it take u to ?!

I just love it !!

بجعات برية

لا تدري أي الواقعين أكثر بؤساً: أن يكون الأدب شاهداً على كل هذا الجحيم الذي مر به شعب خرج من عبودية الإقطاع الفردي إلى عبودية الشيوعية الجماعية وفترة الحرب بينهما أم هي تلك الحياة البائسة التي عاشتها أجيال تخرج من مطب إلى منزلق. ليس هذا هو أهم الأسئلة التي تطرحها على نفسك وأنت تقرأ كتاب "بجعات برية" وهي رواية أو سيرة ذاتية طويلة، طويلة جداً، في ستمائة صفحة تكتبها الكاتبة الصينية يونغ تشانغ ترصد فيها مسيرة ثلاثة أجيال لتكتب عن جدتها التي بيعت لجنرال عسكري زفت إليه أياماً ثم ذهب ليتابع معاركه والعيش مع جوار أخريات وزوجة رئيسية تقيم في مدينة أخرى بعيدة، فيما بقيت الجدة ست سنوات ممنوع عليها الخروج إلى الشارع تحت رقابة جواسيس من الخدم الذين يجيدون حبك المؤامرات والحيل. ثم تنتقل الكاتبة إلى قصة والدتها التي شاركت في حرب الاستقلال ومساعدة الشيوعيين الذين جاءوا ليوقفوا نزف الظلم والمجاعات وتسلط الرأسماليين الكومنتانغ وليصححوا الأخطاء لكنهم يقعون في أخطاء أكثر شدة وتشدداً وحسبوا إنهم يوزعون العدالة على الجميع فيما هم يوزعون البؤس بالتساوي على الناس أجمع. والكاتبة يونغ تشانغ كانت ابنة مخلصة تربت على تعاليم الثورة الثقافية لماو وابنة لأكبر مسؤولين في الحزب الشيوعي الذين نذرا حياتهم للحزب وتفتحت عيناها وعقلها على زملائها من مدارس المتوسطة ينضمون للحرس الأحمر ويخرجون للشوارع والجامعات يطبقون تقاليد ماو، ويتصيدون أعداء الطبقة من البرجوازيين الذين يمارسون تلك التعديات الغير أخلاقية فيعاقبون معلمة في مدرستهم بالضرب والتعذيب لأنها تزوجت من رجل التقت به صدفة في حافلة وأحبته لأن الحب بالمصادفة ضد الأخلاق الماوية ويحرقون كتب الأدب الكلاسيكي الصيني ويحرمون الدراما والمسرح لأنه قد يحمل إيماءات لأخطاء ماو السياسية وأخطاء زوجته وعصابتها الأربعة. وفي مشاهدة مليئة بالعنف من الضرب والتعذيب على أخطاء قد لا تعد أخطاء مثل جلوس الرجل في مقهى تصطدم يانغ تشانغ بمبادئ ضد طبيعتها المسالمة النافرة من العنف وتعذيب الناس تتفتح على حقائق مغايرة لما كانت تظنه عدلاً ففي مشهد تقول فيه "فيما كان الطلبة يشعرون بالإثارة لأنهم يستعرضون سلطتهم على الكبار وقفت في المقهى فوق رأس رجل عجوز اعتبرناه عدواً طبقياً وبرجوازياً لأنه يجلس في مقهى والجلوس في المقهى يعد نمطاً من الحياة البرجوازية السابقة التي يجب أن تمحى وكل ما سبق ماو يجب أن يزال تمالكت شجاعتي وقلت له: قم غادر من هنا. سألني: إلى أين؟ قلت اذهب لبيتك. فقال: أي بيت؟.. إنني أشترك مع حفيدي في غرفة صغيرة، لدي زاوية محاطة بستارة من الخيزران للسرير فقط وعندما يكون الأولاد في البيت آتي هنا لبعض الوقت للراحة والهدوء لماذا تحرمينني من هذا. "كان هذا الرجل في نظر الطلبة برجوازياً عدواً للطبقة".
أًصبح الناس يقومون بتمثيلية يتشابه جميع أفرادها في السلوك والتفكير وكل من يخرج عن هذا التفكير يُعد خائناً ويستحق التعذيب، أصبح الناس يتجاهلون العقل ويعيشون مع التمثيل. وكما تقول الكاتبة "وجدت هذه البيئة لا تطاق إذ أن في مقدوري أن أتفهم الجهل لكني لا أستطيع القول بتمجيده وفي أقل درجة القبول بحقه في السيادة.
وعلى الرغم من طول الرواية التي تتعبك وتحتجزك لأيام في دورتها لثلاثة أجيال إلا أنك تجد فيها سيرة ذاتية غنية بالتفاصيل الاجتماعية تتجنب الحشو بالمقولات والشعارات السياسية الثقيلة فهي في عرضها للأحداث لم تدافع ولم تمجد أياً من الفكريين اللذين عاشت بينهما ولعل دراستها وعملها كأكاديمية للسانيات في جامعة لندن بعد خروجها من الصين التي تغيرت أيضاً جعل سردها عقلانياً يصف ولا يحاكم ويجعلك تشمئز بعقلك لا بعواطفك يجعلك تتأمل وتتأكد من "أن التطرف في كل زمان وظرف لا يولد غير الحرب والدمار ومصادرة حق الإنسان في أن يكون منفرداً ومختلفاً ومميزاً".
و من أكثر ما أثار حزني هو والد الكاتبة ..و كيف بعد كل تفانيه و إيمانه بالشيوعية , حتى انه وضعها اول أولوياته فوق كل من يعرفهم حتى عائلته و فى النهاية ..تعذب أبشع أنواع العذاب حتى فقد عقله ,و أدين بوصفه عدوا طبقيا و مات دون ان يرد له اعتباره مثل باقي زملاءه ..ة حتى النهاية ..مات شريفا ..مؤمنا بالحزب ..بالعدالة ..دون ان يحنى رأسه لأحد.

و من أجمل ما في الرواية ..إنها تسرد وقائع حدثت بكل دقة , دون درامية التأليف و الخيال ..و هده الوقائع المجردة في حد ذاتها كونت دراما حقيقية بعيدة عن خيال التأليف ..فما أجمل أن تكون ..الدراما هى نفسها حياة حقيقة.

Sleepy Floppy

and

the sad memory of the six guinea pigs foetus !

The winter has really started in Benghazi , it is so cold these says , I can feel the humidity in my bones ,
I hate that feeling ,but after thinking , the winter will be always better than the summer for me .
Well …..always when the cold days start Floppy becomes more sleepy and eating a lot .
And today , was not a lucky day for floppy , because there were no vegetables in the house and he was so hungry . So I took some vine leaves from our garden and gave them to him , he did not like that much , but he gave me that look that means : Hey this is better than nothing …lol
And today was the first day I put Floppy in his blanket , he was so happy to get into it ..and made that sound to express his happiness..
I remember a story that happened to me in summer 2005 …that memory made me hate females guinea pigs .
I have a friend who had a female guinea pig from the English school for a few days ..
And that female guinea pig was pregnant ..
My friend had to leave her house to go to the beach for few days , so she gave me her animal for few days to took care of ..
But , it was a hot summer day , a bad Qeblee actually !
And she let the guinea pig in the car not conditioned ,and she went to the college for an hour , and the pregnant guinea pig stayed in the car , huh imagine that !!!!
So after an hour she passed by to give me the animal, I was so angry and upset of her , first cause it was so stupid and selfish of her to leave the pregnant guinea pig in the closed hot car in that horrible weather and second cause she gave me the responsibility of her fault , but what could I say , ahhh!!
Any way , I tried to cool down the animal temperature with cold water , and I made her a comfortable place with a thin blanket , and I gave her some food and water .
The poor animal was so tired and sick of the heat ..
And then … late at night , my sister and me just notice that the poor female guinea pig was showing the signs of delivery. it was hardly breathing and with abdominal contraction , so we thought that it was ready to deliver, and I was happy …
But then I realized that it was an abortion …sadly..
So what happened is , the animal delivered six babies , but they were so red and so small and no hair , and looked so weak just like a piece of meat ..they were just fetus …
And the horror movie was just about to start …the mother start to tear the Placenta membrane , so I thought that she was doing this to help them breath ..until I heard the cracking bones under its teeth…
The mother continued to tear and tear and I was shocked and shocked …
She ate them all ..all the six babies…
I know its is a normal animal behavior , but still , I did not understand it ..
In the morning the mother was so hungry like nothing happened , it was not even sad !
It was full with blood , so I washed it , and gave it food , and that is the story.
I think it did this cause here babies would have died any way .. and she wanted to returned them back , like an act of love , or maybe it knew they would die and it needed their blood to survive cause it was sick …
Any way , I still feel angry with my friend cause she did had no mercy for that female guinea pig !
And now , as time passed…I don’t hate that female guinea pig any longer ..
And whatever was the reason she did what she did .. I believed it was for love ..

My Sleepy Floppy

لا وجود لطائرات تذهب الى حيث تقيم

وصولا الى بنغازى....

مطار بنغازى

fri.november,03,2006

منطقة الرجمة

Al_Rajma

Cyrenaica

Fri,November,03,2006

برقة الحمراء

Fri.Nov.03.2006
Cyrenaica

Tears In Heaven...

One of my dearest friends asked me :
Why you named your blogg Tears In Heaven ?

And here is the answer :

Because of the great singer ‘Eric Clapton’ and his song

,which I love so much : Tears In Heaven

Tears in Heaven is one of the greatest songs ever written

.Any time I listen to this it always reminds me of past loved ones
and the joy they have brought on in their lives
and put into mine I am grateful for Eric for bringing
back memories of those who are no longer with me
except in my heart.

The song, "Tears in Heaven" is one of Eric's greatest songs ever written.

It's terrible that it took Conor's death and Eric's grief to write such a beautiful song.

In his new hit song, My Father's Eyes,

Eric Clapton wrote that he could only see his father through his son's eyes.

Conor died in 1991 after a tragic fall from a New York City highrise.

"I never met my father,"

Mr. Clapton told his biographer in 1985. "

And I realized that the closest I ever came

to looking into my father's eyes was when I looked into my son's eyes."

Mr. Clapton's five-year-old son,

Conor, plummeted to his death in 1991 from the 53rd floor

of the New York City apartment of his mother,

Italian model Lori del Santo.

Missing the father he never knew,

Conor's death pushed Mr. Clapton into depression.

From it emerged Tears in Heaven,

Mr. Clapton's most successful song.

In 2003 Clapton said he was able to work through his grief through music.

For him, the music was a "healing agent".

The song "Tears in Heaven" was

composed by Eric Clapton and Will Jennings,

the song was a dedication to the memory of his son Conor.

The song ended up winning Clapton the

“Best Pop Vocal Performance”

at the 1993 Grammy Awards.

Clapton's album "Unplugged" also won him Album of the Year.

Although the life of Connor was all too short,

his death created a public awareness

of window guards safety for small children.

Clapton was a personal spokesperson.
The apartment which Conor and his mother were staying
in had no such window guards.

The housekeeper had just finished

cleaning the windows and left them open to dry.
Conor ran right past the housekeeper and right out the open window.

Many people have requested this song played

at their loved one's funeralsI love Eric Clapton for what he has given
to the music listeners of the world through
his joy, sorrow, etc. Eric,

you are one of the best."Tears in Heaven" still brings me
to a lump in my throat and tears in my eyes,

for I feel his pain. It is a beautiful song.

And here is the words of the song , I hope you will enjoy it :

Tears In Heaven
(Eric Clapton)
Would you know my name
if I saw you in heaven?
Would it be the same
if I saw you in heaven?
I must be strong and carry on
'Cause I know I don't belong here in heaven...
Would you hold my hand
if I saw you in heaven?
Would you help me stand
if I saw you in heaven?
I'll find my way through night and day
'Cause I know I just can't stay here in heaven...
Time can bring you down, time can bend your knees
Time can break your heart, have you begging please...
Beyond the door there's peace I'm sure
And I know there'll be no more tears in heaven...
Would you know my name
if I saw you in heaven?
Would you be the same
if I saw you in heaven?
I must be strong and carry on
'Cause I know I don't belong here in heaven...